How to Avoid Being a Stalker

This one is for my mom

Do the same 2 or 3 people ALWAYS *like* every single one of your posts or pictures?  Do they *like* and comment on everything? Does it make you feel like you have a Facebook stalker? Is your stalker your mom? My Facebook stalker is definitely my mom (no offence, Mom, I totally love you)!

It’s becoming more and more apparent that we need guidelines on how to not appear to be an online stalker. I say “appear” because I know many people are in the same situation as my mom, who just really truly do care about the person they’re visiting online, and don’t realize that it seems stalker-ish (no, Mom, I don’t really think you’re a stalker).

The best way to not appear to be a stalker is simply to not *like* or comment on anything. But that’s difficult. That LOLz cat really is the cutest thing ever, and I must show my love!

So the next best way to not appear to be a stalker is to monitor your *likes* and comments. For example, only allow yourself to *like* OR comment on every fourth post (and note the emphasis on the “or,” that means you must choose one and can’t do both).

But what if my friend posts 5 times a day, do I still only have to wait for every fourth post? The point of rule of 4 is to avoid *liking*/commenting on a daily basis! If your friend is a habitual poster, commenting on every fourth still isn’t enough. In this case, make it every 3 or 4 days to *like*/comment.

But what if the person only posts once a month? Take that as a clue. They’re not a social person (online, that is…they might be a social-butterfly in person). But it’s even creepier to *like*/comment regularly on someone who is not a perpetual Facebooker.

But what if I just *liked*/commented yesterday and they put up something today that’s even funnier?…I can’t possibly risk waiting 2 days for other posts, missing the ability to *like*/comment on this one! Umm, take that as a hint! If it’s something you have to do, and don’t have the ability to refrain from posting on their page, you’re addicted and need help!

But what if my favorite team posts cool stuff every day? They’re my favorite, and I really do *like* them! That’s different. They’re advertising and actually love your obsession. Every time you *like* something, your friends see it in their feed. This is free advertising for your team, and most likely isn’t stalking. Just know that your friends/family/and co-workers will see your *likes* unless you disable them. You might want to think about disabling this.

Ahh, that sounds like another blog idea. Stay tuned for disabling your *likes*.